1970 Simon & Garfunkel: Bridge Over Troubled Water

If 'Wand'rin' Star' was a strange number one, this is in many ways a whole lot stranger - not so much that it has any inherent 'oddity' factor, but simply by virtue of being what it is. Because for starters, the natural home for 'Bridge Over Troubled Water' is on 33rpm, not 45; that is, it's an album track, not a single. Singles are meant to be memorable short, sharp shocks that deliver a quick knockout punch, not a twelve round affair of jabbing and weaving. Ironically, the B side 'Keep The Customer Satisfied' would have made for a 'better' choice of single, being an upbeat and catchy tune that the milkman could whistle after half hearing it once. But like the boxer (HA!) bedding in for a long haul, 'Bridge Over Troubled Water' demands rather more from it's audience.

Building from a simple piano led introduction, 'Bridge Over Troubled Water' spirals to an astonishing crescendo of orchestrated sound that reverberates with the hymn-like intensity of a piano dropped from the gallery of an empty cathedral. Unlike most of the other number ones that will appear on these pages, it's not something to listen to while doing the ironing and it's a difficult track to schedule into any radio play. Put simply, 'Bridge Over Troubled Water' demands your full respect and attention. And at almost five minutes long, it demands rather a lot of it.

And that's another reason why this is an odd number one - you need to listen, but its infamous production is not for the feint hearted. It's a crammed and condensed end product that needs a good hi-fi set up to get anywhere near to how the song sounded in Simon's head. It will literally play absolute merry hell with any cheap system as it booms, bangs and lisps it's way along and god only knows how this must have sounded on the sort of portable, Dansette type record players that were popular at the time. 'Unlistenable' probably comes close (which incidentally is one of my pet theories as to why 'River Deep, Mountain High' tanked on release. But that's another story).

But away from all this is the song itself, and its appeal is not hard fathom. Although there have been assertions that it's merely an addicts ode to heroin, that strikes me as unlikely. The metaphor of the title is a good and malleable one and yes, the lyrics can lend themselves to the interpretation of wanting a Class A crutch, but they are also direct enough for most to have taken them at face value:

"When you're weary, feeling small,
When tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all;
I'm on your side. when times get rough
And friends just can't be found,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down".

Written down cold, the 'You've Got A Friend' vibe seems simple and vapid, but Garfunkel's vocal adds an edge of almost religious fervour to the track, both at the solemnity of the start where he sounds alone in a universe too big to comprehend, and at the close where he howls defiantly into a maelstrom of superior forces with the desperation of a man with a gun to his head. Again, it's an intense performance that demands your ear, and if you listen properly it can leave you breathless.

For me though, the biggest irony is that the message of selflessness and sacrifice did not extend to the duo themselves. Look at that cover. Garfunkel is the true star of the show here but he's nowhere to be seen. Rather than laying down any bridge, Simon, allegedly incredibly pissed at the amount of attention his co-star received for this, has simply concreted over him. It also shows why the partnership had to be dissolved - Simon may have grown weary at his 'sleeping partner' status, but after delivering a statement like this, where else could they possibly have gone?